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Cover of Even Grimmer Tales

Even Grimmer Tales

2013

Wickedly subversive and sinister retellings. Valerie's third published book

A homicidal pedophile in Red Riding Hood’s forest, a necrophiliac whose worst nightmare comes true when Sleeping Beauty wakes up, a self-seeking and manipulative Goldilocks, a Cinderella whose shoe salesman rescues her from a not too appropriate home situation, a Frog King whose transformation does not bring the expected joy to his princess - these are just a few of the people who inhabit a disconcertingly twisted universe.

This collection of ‘Even Grimmer Tales’ takes the already dark world of the Brothers Grimm and, against the background of twelve well-known stories, explores what the writer in her preamble calls the ‘caves and crannies of the human mind’ – darker places than even the original story-tellers envisaged.

With precision and a fine sense of the ironic, these twelve verse stories – definitely not for children’s bedtime reading – touch on many of the well-known, and some lesser-known, forms of deviant behaviour, but leave the reader with a wry smile to echo the Epilogue’s closing line:

“There, but for God’s good grace, go I.”

You’ll never again read Grimms fairy tales the same way. 

Cover Comments

A sequence of funny, dark and sly monologues, each of which offers a highly entertaining modern take on a traditional fairy story. Mother Goose cooked and stuffed with plenty of spice

— - Peter Goldsworthy, Writer

Poetry

From the revised Cinderella ...

She found her prince, of course.
A nice young man;
a salesman in a shoe shop in the town.
They met one day when she sneaked out,
(a little help from me) to buy some dancing shoes.
I guess that might explain how later on
the story got re-told.

From The Princess and the Frog

You often see him now; his photo’s
in the social pages most weekends.
A different model’s on his arm
each time.

He’s not called ‘Frog’
these days. They’ve nicknamed him
‘The Prince.’ We haven’t seen each other
for a while. He did quite well
out of our breaking up. I don’t regret
the money that it cost.

From Goldilocks and the Three Bears

It wasn’t true, the way they told it later.
Made it sound as if she was
a victim! I kept my peace, and let the story stand.

We didn’t throw her out. Truth was

she sloped away one night,
with every bit of cash we had, my jewellery,
and all the family silver. We never saw
young Goldilocks again.

I sometimes wonder
who she’s taking for a ride these days.

The Fisherman and his Wife

Oh yes, I’m working still, but there were
months in grubby little joints. The men were pigs.
I had to start again, and work my way back up. 

All that’s behind me now.

I have my special talents, and I know their uses.
There’ll always be more men who need a woman
who’s prepared to wear the pants! And wield a whip!

5 Reviews